I’ve been thoroughly invested in my alternative exercise routine for several days, weeks, months?!?! all to no avail. Still no weight lost. I’ve been spending 20 to 30 sweat-heavy minutes fast walking on my treadmill several mornings a week, jog cutting my lawn, stretch painting my living room and squat gardening, but other than an increasingly nasty demeanor and creaky knees, nothing has happened.
My calorie count, I admit, has developed a mind of its own lately. I did eat some pizza the other day, but it was fundraiser pizza for a good cause and therefore doesn’t really count. Actually it’s amazing how many excuses for eating poorly I can come up with.
Celebration food, for example, is a gimme. When at parties, events and other social gatherings where food is provided it is expected that you eat whatever it is. I’m not one to disappoint and that's half the fun of the party. Cake, for example, if you don’t eat the cake at a celebration/birthday/wedding what kind of person does that make you? (other than skinny?)
The other day I went to a bar with my skinny coworker Angie and she ordered fried pickles. Granted, I did talk her into it, but I can’t help it that she could only eat half of them and virtually forced me to finish them, can I? I didn’t want to be rude, I’m trying to make friends here. Breaking bread, or in this case pickles, is how relationships are made. What was I supposed to do? Throw them out? My grandma would turn over in her grave. I come from a poor family and we just don’t waste perfectly good fried pickles, which probably helps explain the PHAT blog.
12 comments:
Here's what I do when we celebrate birthdays at the office: I always tell myself that I'll have a slice of cake NEXT time. Then I tell myself that every time and end up never eating the cake. It's a small victory, but hey - those can add up!
Well I certainly haven't tried jog mowing the lawn, but maybe I should start.
I promise to no longer force fried pickles, no matter how delicious, down your throat.
Good advice Jess, I am however really looking for more excuses! JK. I think I'll promise myself TWO pieces of cake the next time just to kick the incentive up a notch.
Angie, jog mowing is best done in the backyard with the dog locked securely in the house. FYI - flipflops are not the best choice of footwear in this case.
Everything your doing at home seems to be right on target. It's the stuff away from home -- mainly sitting there for hours in theater seating there as council meetings happen before your very eyes -- that's the problem. You want encouragement? Encourage faster council meetings.
Anonymous;
You make a good point, but if I could speed up meetings it would have been done long ago. You would have thought the room full of guns at the last meeting would've sped things up, but no.
Maybe I should stand out in the atrium and do lunges and knee lifts for an hour or so... you don't think I'd get made fun of do you?
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